Hesitantly Ready

Dare I say it? Tomorrow morning I am scheduled, yet again, to get this long awaited second round of Bendamustine chemotherapy. I am now six weeks past the first treatment ... off treatment two weeks longer than expected. I think it's time to induce me.

In all seriousness, I will go to get my blood count levels checked locally later this afternoon to verify that my platelets have climbed high enough. Last week that was not the case, so I've been working on platelet building all week long. I'm not really sure what that consists of, but it's required a lot of rest, plenty of good food and an incredible amount of patience (not always easy to come by). Let's hope it worked.

If so, it's by train we go back into NYC. This time with my mom as my companion. Two ladies conquering the big city. With the help of the steroids to balance out my Thursday and Friday treatments, we're hoping for a couple days of museums, art attractions, shopping and a Broadway show. But we're flexible enough to know that the next couple of days may consist of watching movies in bed back at Miracle House. My post-treatment capabilities are always variable so we'll determine our day's activities as my body dictates ... no expectations. It's without plans and expectations that room is left for the most memorable of happenings to emerge.

To again quote the poet Lady Lee:

"I'm taking down the shelf of expectations

Crowded by imitations

I learned that now I can.

I'm letting go little by little,

But I am. "