Friday, February 12, 2010

The Little Follicles That Could

Something is brewing. Despite all odds, my little follicles have made a remarkable growth spurt over the past two days. We had another ultrasound appointment this morning and low and behold the few follicles that were just emerging during the last disappointing ultrasound have now sprouted and pushed their way toward maturity (with the help of these past two days of hormones, and I like to think all the walking and visualizations I've been doing and all the grapefruits I've been eating).

Craig and I were completely taken aback when the doctor went over the numbers with us and said how much more promising things looked and how pleased he was. We went in there ready to pull the plug on this ordeal knowing that we gave it our best shot. But this time the bright, white room felt illuminated and refreshing. This experience has been nothing less than a roller coaster ride - the kind where your feet dangle unprotected below you.

We now have four mature follicles to work with, each of which could possibly contain an egg. This is nowhere near the dismal news we received on Wednesday that just one was mature with three showing potential. These little guys have pushed right past the 10mm marker necessary. I knew all the swelling and bloating I was feeling had to be a good sign. My ovaries were just a little slow - they're allowed to get chemo brain, too.

This is still of course nowhere near the 10 follicles that they like to see when doing a retrieval, but clinically, the doctor recommends that we move forward and that our chances of getting 1 or 2 embryos to freeze are good. Is the situation ideal, no? But for the hand we've been dealt, we're very happy.

We decided that the fact that these follicles are fighting so hard to grow means that we can't give up right now. Someone (baby Frosty, perhaps?) is trying to tell us something. So we're going ahead with the retrieval - fully knowing that the chance (though smaller) still exists that we'll end up with no eggs or with eggs that don't fertilize through ICSI. But if we don't try then we'll never know, and the last thing we want to do is look back on this chance with regret in the future.

We're prepared for it not to work out and will be completely fine with that. We know that having a biological child is not the only way to be a parent and look forward to the chance to create a family no matter what the "means" of making that family is. Like "Brangelina," we'll have our own United Nations of love under our roof. But maybe, just maybe, there'll be some mini Craig-and-Karins in the mix.


  1. I have a huge smile on my face! I'm so happy for the two of you. Stay hopeful and positive.


  2. Karin,

    I never know if you ever even read these comments. But I want you to know that I check in every day to hear of your progress.
    All the oldies at Southwest School always talk about your latest posting and send our positive thoughts.
    I understand your need to know that little "Diamonds" are in the future for you. But...I have been teaching for 41 years....and every day I see a little face looking at me and I think...."I want to take you home, nuture you and help you see that your are a dynamite creation! Be it yours genenetically or yours by love and will be a parent some day and I hope I am around to see this beutiful product of the love and determination that has been passed to you and your husband.
    Just fight to get strong and healthy. and the offsprings of your family love will conquer and multiply!!!
    Mrs. Hogan

  3. Good New is a Great way to start a Weekend! So Happy for the two of you! :)

  4. i am very happy that things have progressed. I am sure that your love and optimism have had a significant impact. We can only pray that there will be bright sunshine at the end of this very long and difficult tunnel.

  5. Listen here Mr. and Mrs.---Blake and I went through 4 years of infertility treatments at Uconn and I was scheduled for a hysterectomy in May 1993---I was 40 years old, basically told "forget it" and-----we conceived a beautiful baby girl--spontaneously in Feb 1993---she is now 16---ok 56 and 16 ain't the greatest but we have had the most remarkable time with her---as Blake would say--"swim fishey swim"---we are behind you 120%---I hope we can at least be second or third grandparents!!!! Congrats and keep up the good work xoxoxo Love Bev & Blake

  6. rock on. you are A*W*E*S*O*M*E*
    happy that you received better news!!!!
    (from the dickberries - our hollywood name)